Is My Life Boring?

After a brief passing conversation, I started to wonder, is my life boring? It's not very scheduled or organized. We generally fly by the seat of our pants -- within reason, of course. In the fall, we've found cheerleading fits our children quite well. Well, it did last year when it was just Olivia cheering. Having two kids on different teams and only one parent home consistently can make things tough. I know... wah, wah, cry, cry. People do it with way more kids, I'm sure. But this is MY life we're talking about.

So, we put both girls in cheer this fall. As of today, their schedules take up 6 out of 7 days each week. Natalie has practice on Sunday, Wednesday and Thursday night with a game Saturday morning each week. Olivia practices Monday, Thursday and Saturday with a game on Friday nights. Mark works Monday thru Saturday and is only rarely home in time to pick up some of the driving, although I do give him credit because he busts his butt home and grabs our second car to come relieve me of one child.

I recently overheard some moms talking about the number of children people have. One said, "I don't know how people have more than two kids! We only have one and I can barely keep up with her schedule!" Really? Are you freaking kidding? Another says, "I know it! I would never have more than two. You don't want to be out-numbered by your children!" Out-numbered? What kind of crap is that? I suppose I'm technically out-numbered if you consider children as equals in your house. Here, though, I'm the adult. They're the children. This 3:1 or 3:2 ratio those women are implying does not exist. My children are not my friends. They are children. There's no such thing as being out-numbered in our family.

Right, back to my boring life. I'm a terrible housekeeper. I always felt like I'm a great wife and great mother, but my cleaning skills are sorely lacking. Is my house disgusting? Should you call CPS and report that my children live in an unsafe environment. Nah. It's not THAT bad. Would I want you to walk through my door right now and see how lazy I am? Definitely not. Mark's job is to go to work, make money and support our family financially. My job is a stay at home mom. I do homework, fix boo-boos, stop fights, change diapers, find missing socks and spankies (duh, cheer), fix hair, make sure teeth are brushed, make sure homework goes back to school... I don't see anything in the Mom-contract about cleaning house. Shouldn't that fall on BOTH our shoulders?

So, I don't clean. I sound terrible. I do taxi. I drive from here to there. I pay our bills (and mostly in a timely fashion). I buy the groceries, do most of the cooking. So what if I don't dust?!

I feel like I'm starting to ramble which must mean I'm out of ideas to write. I don't think I really decided if my life is boring or not. LOL It's interesting to me, usually, so I guess that's all that matters. :)


EDIT: I forgot to mention that today is the national Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. It cut through me like a knife. I wonder if I'll ever stop feeling so deeply for the children we never knew?

An Over-due Update

It's been 10 months since I last blogged and I figured I'd step back in. My original intent was to blog about my weight loss but once I started, I wasn't that interested in it. I did lose some weight. I was 221 in January, got down to about 209 but I seem to have leveled out around 215... for now. I have plans for Weight Watchers in my future and hopefully I can meet my goal of 175 and stay there!

A lot has changed. Shawna is now a year old and starting to walk. It's increasingly more difficult to blog when your toddler is in your face and banging on your chest (and grabbing your fingers while you type). Despite all that, and maybe because of it, she is my pride and joy. When I was younger, I used to try to figure out which of us kids (Andy, Tim or myself) was my parent's favorite. They insisted they loved us all the same. Now that I am the mom to three of my own, I know there is truth there. I love each of my children with equal passion, but for different reasons. Right now, Shawna is the one person in my life that can ALWAYS make me smile. If fear of sounding like a total sap, she is my sunshine.

Mark and I are making a big move in a little more than 8 weeks. We are packing up our family and moving back to Michigan. I was estatic when we first decided. I didn't even have to twist his arm to get him to go. He was offered his old job back, with more money. The clincher for us was renting my childhood home from my parents for what they pay for it. This may finally be the move that puts us in a more comfortable place financially - lower bills and higher income. I do have mixed feelings though. We worked so hard to make a life here... Natalie has a best friend (Meghan) at school. I have a made a friend here, too. But still... the best friends cannot match family in my book. Things are set to go, so no matter what, we're moving, but I know there will be an adjustment period I'm not sure I'm ready for.

I wonder sometimes if I'm the only person in the world without a best friend. It seems, everywhere I look, people are buddied up. It's definitely something I envy. I had an awesome core group of friends before we left Michigan, but everyone has moved in their own directions. I wouldn't have been able to pick one best from that group of three ladies. They were ALL the best for different reasons. I still talk to them all... but it's just not the same anymore. I hope moving closer will mend some of those broken ties.

I guess I've babbled on long enough now. Maybe I'll check back in sooner than 10 months from now. I'm sure this would be a good place to vent my frustrations with our move... :)